Sunday Funnies

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING,
SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD?

MY NAME IS JACK , AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST
APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HER DDS DIPLOMA ON THE WALL,
WHICH BORE HER FULL NAME. SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, BEAUTIFUL,
DARK-HAIRED GIRL WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 40-ODD YEARS AGO. COULD SHE BE THE SAME GIRL THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HER, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT. THIS GRAY-HAIRED WRINKLED WOMAN WITH THE VERICOSE VIENED LEGS WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE.

AFTER SHE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HER IF SHE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL.

'YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG,' SHE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE.

'WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?' I ASKED.

SHE ANSWERED, 'IN 1959. WHY DO YOU ASK?'

'YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!', I EXCLAIMED.

SHE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, WRINKLED FACED, FAT-ASSED, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT BITCH ASKED,

'WHAT DID YOU TEACH'???