Saturday, December 29, 2007

Chuck Norris Will Be Punching Everyone in the World in the Mouth

1.Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
2.There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
3.Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
4.The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
5.There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
6.Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
7.The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
8.Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
9.Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
10.Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

These little ditties were taken from the web site Chuck Norris Facts, which is filled with these crazy made up facts about Chuck Norris. Funny isn't it, and who would believe any of these things. Oh maybe a moron or a jerk or maybe someone with no sense of humor. But Chuck is not laughing because he is suing the people behind a new book, based on the website. The Truth About Chuck Norris is the book.

One opinion of why Chuck-a-la is so pissed is from Daniel Radosh at the Huffinton Post. Which I paraphrase.

In his lawsuit, Norris alleges that "Some of the 'facts' are racist, lewd
or portray Chuck engaged in illegal activities. The real problem is that
the book's humor depends on a highly refined sense of irony, and by and large,
the Christian culture bubble does not do irony. It doesn't get irony. It doesn't
trust irony. Christian fiction, like Christian rock is always deadly
earnest.




A Christian joke:A child came home from Sunday School and told his mother that he had learned a new song about a cross-eyed bear named Gladly. It took his mother a while before she realized that the hymn was really "Gladly The Cross I'd Bear,"

Ha.

I bet this is going to be a real boost for the Chuckster's career. But the one thing I hope, is that he does not read this post and reach out through my computer and give me one of his round house kicks to the head. Chuck, you know I love ya babe.

GO GIANTS !

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