This is the story of a man and his exercise bike, and how the relationship grew. It all started in spin class a few weeks ago. The YMCA had decided that they needed new bikes, as the old one were falling apart like a Yugo. The first bike that was brought in was the Keiser M3 . And it was a doozy . I like this one very much, it was slick looking and it was smooth, it was love at first sight, so I thought. Then a couple of days later they brought in the LeMond with its yellow highlights and its funky look. That was it the yellow highlights, I was hooked and the LeMond became my new love. And then came the Star Trac and at first there was no connection, but then Evil started to point out some of the best part of the Star Trac and that's how it began.
First we would only meet in class and then it was just out for coffee. But then I noticed that we started to spend all most all of our time together. We started going to the grocery store together and then it was out to eat. It was becoming awkward, that is, hanging out so much with a exercise bike. People were starting to stare and point fingers. But I didn't care, it was my new friend and that's all that counted. We started to go hiking together and even climbed Mt. Katadin (picture provided). I don't know were are relationship is going, but do you know what, I'm going to just let it happen. And, I almost forgot, do you know what the Star Trac can also do? Make a heck of a pancake and a wonderful dry martini. People think our relationship is kind of creepy. What do you think.
8 comments:
I have to hand it to you UW, just when I think you have squeezed as much mileage out of a joke as you can, you come back for more.
How does Evil put up with you???
We use the exact same bikes in spin over here that you photoshopped into that picture.
- Snoot
People think our relationship is kind of creepy. What do you think.
I'd expect no less from you ... but I need to know if you're keeping this relationship a secret from your better half ... I just don't know how she tolerates your perpetual trysts!
What photoshop?
Hey Willie,
You just won't let it go will you?
Don't come whining to me for sympathy when you get your just deserts...
M
The heart wants what it wants.
I love this photograph. I mean you look like a super hero and you appear so decisive as you stand atop the mountain with the beautiful blue skies & your handsome new pal in the background. Wow, it just brings me tears of joy to see you so happy Willie.
Hey Willie.
I know a guy who does mechanical reassignment surgery who could help you out. (Okay he runs a chop shop, but he is a hell of a great mechanic!)
He says (with a heavy Brooklyn accent and an unlit cigar in his mouth) ya know, I can put some wheels on dat thing and youse guys could go somewhere private together.
Willie, how can you expect a relation to go anywhere with a stationary bike?
If you want to move on to the next step, a more meaningful relationship, you need to let go of the tension and roll out into the real world.
But be aware, not everyone will approve of your behavior. It is illegal in seven southern states and violates at least two commandments! (Thank goodness Charlton Heston is not around to see you two together!)
I looked up your new love online and was shocked!
“Dynamic Heart Rate Control”, “adjusts intensity level based on the user’s heart rate” and I don’t want to even guess what “Dual platform pedals with inline strap-ons” is all about.
But as Mark Twain said, as long as you don’t scare the horses, what you do in the privacy of your own home is your business!
Jack you are the voice of reason, and where do you get those wheels.
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