Monday, May 23, 2011

Christians. .......What Will They Think of Next


Things are about to get Biblical in Kentucky. On Thursday, the Kentucky Tourism Development Finance Authority gave final approval to grant $40 million in tax rebates to build a biblical theme park called "The Ark Encounter."

Kentucky Tourism Development Finance Authority voted unanimously to grant more than $40 million in tax rebates for the project, which is scheduled to cost $172 million.

In Willie's world, I'm thinking how can the state government back this project. Isn't it crossing the line between church and state. I wonder if the state would give a tax break to a theme park called Mecca.

Some of the attractions at the new park, which by the way, I've heard that they will only allow 2 people, a man and a women, to enter the park at the same time. Then there is the Abraham and Isaac ride where you can bring the kids into a simulated sacrifice. Just before plunging a knife into you child's chest you are stopped by God and given a blindfold for you child to wear, simulating the blinding of Issac. Really cool.

Then there is resurrection land. You have to call ahead for the set up. You and your child stand before a large stone covering a cave. The stone is moved to one side and what appears is a family member who had passed away recently, walks out to greet you. The reason that you would have to call ahead is, that the park would rig the deceased like a marionette, with cables through each arm and leg.Just imagine the joy on your kids face when their grandfather, who just passed away, walk out to greet them.

Last but not least, is one of the best attractions it's crucifixion land. That's right kiddies you get to feel what Jesus's executioners felt. As you enter the attraction you are handed a large cross that you will drag up to the top of our recreated Calvary or Golgotha. Upon arriving at the top, you will be given two choices,do you want to nail or stab with the spear. Each child will be giving his personal cross station. A park employees, dressed as roman solders, bring out tree large spikes. Watch your kids eyes widen as the solders places the spikes in your kids hand. And don't forget that beautiful woolen mallot.(Which can be purchased after the experience). Watch their little eyes light up as the simulated blood spurts from the wounds of our life like Jesus, as they pound those spikes home. It's a experience they can tell their therapist about later on in life.

And also for a little less money you can crucify one of the two thieves. It's fun for the whole family. So don't forget to visit "The Ark Encounter", you won't soon forget it.

4 comments:

Lodo Grdzak said...

Gotta love our southern neighbors.

Willie Y said...

You got it. I think a wall around certain parts of this country would work.

Spencer Troxell said...

The funny thing is that I can't be certain this is satirical.

Willie Y said...

I know Spencer, it's not crazy to think that it could be possible.