I am looking to be the first citizen of Kepler=22b. The one fly in the ointment is that it is 600 light years away.I am still working on that part in my basement lab after spin class and on the weekends. Kepler-22b is a planet with earth-like characteristics discovered by the Kepler spacecraft. And what amazing coincidence to discover a planet with the same name as the spacecraft......go figure.
Kepler-22b has several Earth-like characteristics one being, its temperature is around 72 degrees Fahrenheit. Sounds good to me as one of the first laws I will institute when I am king is that the planet will be pant less. That's right no pants for anyone. This will, for the males anyway, eliminate all small talk with potential mates, as all it takes is a gaze downward to know if there is a attraction. One plus for gals is that they could use that area as a so called fur covered billboard welcome mat, signaling their availability or not. This could really work on Kepler-22 in that it would speed up re population.
To promote good will for all my Kepler-22b-ites, I would pass a law that every person would be given a puppy. They are so lovable and who could resist these little balls of fur.Our puppy's will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage. They will make us all on Kepler-22b better people.
After the puppy's reach maturity they will be picked up,slaughtered and recycled into a renewable food source called "Uncle Willie's Puppy Meat or Pupaloney".....yum puppylicious. Then you start the process all over with your new puppy.
That's only a couple of the ideas I have for the new world. Oh yes it will be good to be the king.............Oh yea, and no Fox News.
4 comments:
Not sure I agree w/ your puppy policy. But I'm a big supporter of the no-pants provision!
One out of two is not bad. And I think you could get to love Pupaloney.......on a hard roll with mustard, forget about it.
No pants, No puppies. I'll be your centrist opposition for high office on Super Earth.
Bring it on Spencer, the no pants party is ready.
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